Friday, July 28, 2017

Stop Being So Hard On Yourself!

If you have followed my blog, then you know I am claiming my 40th year and beyond to be better than my thirties. As I have, also said, a lot of growth has to happen to achieve this goal.

Most women, not all have something we would like to change about our self. For me, it’s my weight.

Here’s the deal…I like food a lot, especially cupcakes, so there's a 99.9% chance that I am not going to be skinny. LOL. I am doing better working out and people have even commented that I look like I am losing weight (which I typically brush off). Yep, I need to learn how to take compliments too. Baby steps people. J

Anyhoo…a couple of weeks ago I was going through my old pics on Facebook because I am thinking of going back to my dark hair. My mom doesn’t love it, so I was trying to show her how cute it was. I found the pics below and was like "whoa baby!" These pics are six plus years old and I was shocked. I am currently smaller...which means I have succeeded in keeping the weight off a while. Who knew?

Here I am, always beating myself up about my weight and this is a huge accomplishment. I may not be "high school skinny," but this is and should be a big deal.

I say all of that to say I have to start lifting myself up, noticing my accomplishments and taking compliments. If I want 40 and beyond to be great I have to accept that I am great!  Will it be easy? Probably not. Old habits are hard to break, but I am definitely going to work on it. At the end of the day, we should always be growing; so, being a work in progress isn’t a bad thing. The point is to continue to do the work.


40 and doing the work

Thursday, July 20, 2017

Am I Walking in the Spirit of Girlfriend?

As you know, I am single and have been for a long time and I’m not sure why. If you know me and/or have read my blog you know it is not by choice.

Before you say it...I know! I know I have to wait on God, but while I am waiting I want to make sure I am ready when he sends me the older version of Kofi Siriboe (better known as Ralph Angel from "Queen Sugar") LOL! 

 I saw a video clip from Pastor John Gray and it has me thinking. In the clip he says “Ask the Lord to make sure you are not walking in the spirit of girlfriend. The Bible says… he that finds a wife, finds a good thing and attains favor. You are not a wife when I marry you; you are a wife when I find you. Wife is not the presence of a ring, but of your character. The reason many men can’t find a wife is because we have too many women walking around with the spirit of a girlfriend. Giving wife benefits to a man that is not going to marry you. Boys play games, men cut covenant. “

So, the big question…am I walking like a girlfriend instead of showing that I am a wife? Also, if I am walking in the spirit of girlfriend is it because I’m not ready to be a wife?

Understand, I haven’t had a date in forever and a day so I’m not out here giving wife benefits, but this made me think about how I am presenting myself.

What do you all think about this statement from Pastor Gray? Do you agree? Disagree? Am I over thinking this?

Let me know your thoughts!


Wondering if I am functioning in the spirit of girlfriend

Friday, July 14, 2017


With all that is on my plate this has been a tough week. I have been trying hard to wake up happy, think positive etc. but this week was a struggle.

The worst part is that it’s all on me…MY TIME MANAGEMENT SKILLS SUCK!

Let me give you some back story. I have a newish job...I have been there a little over two months. It is completely different than anything I have ever done so this learning curve is huge.

This job is challenging because it’s causing me to use a part of my brain that I haven’t used in years. I work over 8 hours most days and lunch breaks are few and far between. When I leave work I’m pooped and the thought of doing anything else makes my head hurt.

On top of that I’m all #healthynotskinny so at least three days a week I try to work out. The earliest I usually get home is around 8:45pm.

Oh, and let’s not forget, once I’m home I need to eat and get ready for the next day.

I also took on a leadership role in an organization I am apart of which means more work and I had an article due for my church magazine this week!

Last but not least…The Blog! I have so many dreams for my blog and where I want to see it go…more work!


I want to be great, wonderful, magnificent and amazing in everything I do but right now I’m feeling a bit mediocre.

Have you ever been so tired and frustrated that you can’t even function? That’s me right now. I have so much I want/need to do and I can’t wrap my head around how to make it all work.

Some friends, bloggers I stalk and my mom seem to do more than me daily and they make it look so easy. Did I mention they always look fabulous too?

Listen, I have worn jeggings to work more than once this week LOL and nothing on my face.

So, why am I telling you this? The purpose of this blog is to be transparent in sharing my journey in this thing called life. Social media will make you believe people’s lives are perfect. I know I have and do fall into the comparison trap (see above).

I’m sharing because last week I was preaching positivity, being happy etc. and this week...well...I’m not positive at all and its okay as long and I don’t live in this phase.

This is for anyone that is having a tough time. We are human and everyday isn’t going to be perfect but we just have to keep pushing. As the saying goes…This too Shall Pass!


Overwhelmed but not giving up

Thursday, July 6, 2017

Now that the Glitter has Settled

I have been forty for almost two months now and so far so good. If you follow me on social media then you know my birthday month was amazing. I don’t think I could have planned it out any better. I know for sure that I am really loved and blessed with the most amazing friends and family.

I started this journey to forty because I wanted my forties to be completely different than my thirties. My thirties were full of what if’s, woe is me, why not me, what is going to happen next week, next month or next year. I want my forties to be full of simply living and enjoying the moment.