I Had A Major Epiphany Over Christmas!!

TRUTH!!

I know I said the month of December we should put real life aside but something happened over Christmas and I have to share.

Definition of Perception: An awareness of things through the physical senses, especially sight!

My weight has always been an issue or at least I can’t ever remember a time I didn’t think about it and I think…NO… I know it has shaped my life and not in a good way.

Based on how I see myself I have been a chunkster forever…maybe lose a pound or two here or there but over all chubby. And in high school I really thought I was fat,that carried to college and now.

Well, Christmas Eve my parents and I were going through old pictures and my family loves pics so there were a lot. But as I was looking at them I mean on so many…the majority I was pretty small. See pic below... this was around 1993 or 1994 and I mean I was in shock I really thought I was fat. I mean I recall being self-conscious, not feeling as pretty as other girls due to my size WTH!!

Don't judge my hair LOL!

It’s so crazy how we see ourselves when we are younger and how it carries into adult hood because I still for the most part feel the exact same way…now granted I’m not the size in the picture but almost 40 does that right. But am I that fat and why can’t I see that I’m not.

I have absolutely no answers at all but I am sharing because as I’ve said before this blog isn’t just about me…I hope I can help someone else. I want us all to see our true self when we look in the mirror. My goodness even now the way I think or feel about myself at times you would think I was 300 plus pounds.

So, how do I fix this…I don’t know. But I have some ideas that will help and I am open to suggestions.

I think I have made the first step by acknowledging it...removing my mask and accepting that I need to work on this asap. Step one complete!

I need to start saying a daily affirmation not sure what it will be but it will definitely include lady you do not weigh 300 lbsJ!

Also, thinking about the show Being Mary Jane…placing sticky notes of only positive things all around where I look constantly. I have a vision board up in my room but maybe creating a new one with positive quotes, pics etc. and also stop putting myself down…I say  I’m fat a lot (if you are my friend reading this no comments on this part) and I need to stop. You can speak truth into existence so I am going to do that.

Now will this happen overnight Heck NO but I can start working on it now and make it a practice because if you think about it, it took me almost 40 years to see it so it’s going to take longer than a day, week, or month to break the habit. But I want to so I will!

Signed,

Almost 40 and a work in progress!