My First (and definitely not my last) Blogalicious Conference!

I had the best time!!

I am not even sure where to begin…my first Blogalicious conference far exceeded my expectations! I have been blogging I guess about a year and I was really going to the conference just to meet more bloggers. I thought how cool would it be to meet other bloggers, maybe make a friend or two. That is really all I expected and I figured anything else would be icing on the cake. What I received was a 10 layer wedding cake with icing and fondant LOL!

In Case You Were Wondering!!

I am about that count down life dawg!! LOL

We are now 192 days away from the BIG 4 0 and there are a couple of things I am pretty sure are not going to happen…I will not be married by 40 nor will I be pregnant or have a kid arghhh so I am working on letting that sink in and moving on to what can happen by the BIG 4 0!!! I know stranger things have happened but I like to live in reality LOL!

What I do know is that mannnn I have a lot of 1^st World Problems and things that I cannot change only God can when he sees fit so what I need to do is focus on what I can change because the majority of the things I am stressing myself out about I can’t fix…only the man upstairs can.

So, what does that mean for me and the next 192 days??? Most importantly how am I going to bring in 40…it falls on a Saturday so I feel like that is a sign that I must celebrate in the biggest way possible…right??? I’m open to ideas so bring em on!

WORRY ABOUT YOURSELF!!!

Let's do this people!!

I meant that title to be in all caps LOL! This is for me and all you other people out there who are worrying about everybody else…STOP IT!!

My dad always tells me if you spend 100% of your time worrying about yourself how much time do you have to worry about someone else…get it, got it, good!  

Got Friends????

I mean real true friends!!

Before you answer yes…see if you can say yes to all of these things below or at least a few:

·       Non-judgmental friends

·       Friends who can hear you say about three words and know something isn’t right

I Need to Free Myself of the Have It All Desire!!

Me 5 days out the 7 day week LOL (minus the degree)

Who in the world put this desire in my head?

Last week was tough at work and this week isn’t shaping up any better. I’m overwhelmed, frustrated etc. and I find when this happens the first thing I ignore is myself. I didn’t work out one time last week and I ate A LOT of crappy food. And when I did finally get home I was still thinking about work so I was up late which means I was exhausted every day. But this is my pattern when my life isn’t going how I think it should I fall into this trap.

 I was scrolling through Instagram (yep it was late and I should have been sleep) and saw this excerpt on xonecole from Devi Brown and I was like OMG this is me. She said:

“As women we don’t give ourselves enough love and care and acceptance. Every day I would wake up feeling like I needed to escape and that’s a terrible feeling to have, wanting to escape but you have no idea to where. I was very restless and through that restlessness I got really sad because everything I thought I was working towards had been paused. I freed myself of that have-it-all desire and mentality because the truth is we’re just people. We’re just human beings. Having it all is not my goal.”

 I can’t begin to tell you how many times I have read this excerpt. It’s actually saved in my phone. It resonated with me more than anything I have read in a long time. And it’s weird because if you remember my last post was about not wanting to come back to my life to stay at my parent’s house forever.

I Need to Create A Life That I Never Want To Leave!

This journey to 40 is something else and it seems like daily I learn more and more about what I want. I am also coming to the realization that I may not be there by 40 but at least I am working on it.

A couple of weekends ago I went to visit my parents as I usually do every other month or so because I like them a lot and their house is the best. There is no reason to be an adult, they always have food, they have a TV double my size that they allow me to watch (they watch the smaller one) to catch up on all my shows (yeah, I turned my cable off…being an adult sucks). Nobody ask me questions, I don’t have to do any work just be super  duper lazy. And it’s always a good time but by the end of the weekend I’m ready to get back to my house and reality.

Do I Really Have As Many Hours In A Day As Beyoncé???

Do I though???

Before you say it I know it’s been a long time but I’m back finally!!

Here we go…have you ever felt like you were always busy but you weren’t accomplishing anything? No? It’s just me…well I’ll be.

I am constantly busy, always doing something, always tired yet I don’t feel like I am doing anything. I am sure I wasted my 20’s and seems like most of my 30’s worrying about when I was going to get married, when I was going to have a baby and when I was going to find that perfect job. Yet here I am literally almost 40 and I don’t feel close to it at all and that scares me.